January 2012
duwang:
bansand:
i put prunes in a mug and i put potato chip on the prunes and i put vinegar on it now im eatign it
no one cares jackson
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k-nock:
See more clowns
Not talk for a whole month
Find out how much of my body I can cover with anti-perspirant before it kills me
Write an entire newspaper all by myself
Not talk to my dad
(REDACTED)
Witness something unspeakable
Practice holding my breath
Spend less time looking at my wrist pretending I have a watch
Call that kid who ate his scabs in 8th grade a “weird bitch” because...
December 2011
cisgender:
SINCE NOBODY IS PUTTING ME ON ANY OF YOUR BLOGGING LISTS, MAYBE I’LL MAKE MY OWN FUCKING LITTLE LIST, HM? HERE’S MY 2011 BLOG LIST.
BEST BLOGGER
CISGENDER.TUMBLR.COM
PRETTIEST BLOGGER
CISGENDER.TUMBLR.COM
WOW, YOU’RE SO FUNNY, AND GOOD LOOKING!
CISGENDER.TUMBLR.COM
BLOGGERS I WISH I COULD BE LIKE
CISGENDER.TUMBLR.COM
PEOPLE I HOPE NEVER DELETE, SO NICE AND SMART
...
kindlesong:
stankubrick:
Niggas in Paris one time
Niggas in Paris just kind of half heartedly but they stop by the end of the chorus because Kanye really isn’t feeling it tonight
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a joyous celebration of kittenhood:... →
wakingthegoldenwood:
“Stop fighting this,” e whispered, gently stroking a finger down the side of tumblr’s cheek. He flinched, but didn’t recoil as vehemently as e had expected, so he continued, rubbing soothing patterns onto the familiar blue skin.
“Don’t you see? We’re meant to be…
Prince Williams ain’t do it right if you ask me
cause I was him I would have
married fish filet
because I’m literally the worst at managing my time I didn’t get to everyone’s christmas cards so
everyone else I’m gonna send you either random cards or valentine’s day cards or maybe just apology cards
please enjoy
dorkfart asked: do you ever exercise or does mother nature just let you ingest filth and look like that ?
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okay WOW TUMBLR I had like 5 new messages in my inbox and no notifications and I just happened to click it just now
I’m sorry if you sent me something and I haven’t replied ahhh
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fedorafreak:
what if you were tanning and you had your baby on your belly and you both got sunburned sooo bad that the baby died and you survived with a terrible sunburn and for a year after the baby’s death you could see the faint outline on your body of the place and position in which your baby died as a reminder of the mistake you made that day every time you take off your shirt hahaha
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Why mark your food with your name
fedorafreak:
when drawing faces is so much more fun?
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"Dreams" a short story by Desiree
jellybeing:
*pinches nose closed*
*puffs up cheeks*
*turns into a water bear*
*floats away*
i have a better life to live now
with meaning
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FREE FOOD ASAP (SW Gainesville)
dumbjabronimotherfucker:
Date: 2011-12-29, 1:46PM EST Reply to: sale-jqpaw-2774160578@craigslist.org
Hi, I have a shitload of bagged lettuce.
FREE BEES (melbourne)
dumbjabronimotherfucker:
Date: 2011-12-29, 12:12PM EST Reply to: sale-mhvek-2773979929@craigslist.org
free bees you remove them …..they are nested inside tree limb its ok to cut the limb if need bee ( lol)
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marththebland:
I had a dream last night that I thought would be a really cool idea for a video game it’s like these aliens on a space ship and they’re doctors and another alien gets beamed onto the ship and they’re like “we can’t treat this guy he’s not our species we don’t know his anatomy” but they get called to duty anyway it’s called Call of Duty
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chrisxlyle:
|
|ヮ◕)
|◕ヮ◕)
|ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
|◕ヮ◕)
|ヮ◕)
|
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vondell-swain:
making out with a girl and gradually pushing her face toward the lips of a horse that is standing right next to you
“It’s amazing how many people eat at Olive Garden”
– my mom
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Fight Club more like Fart Club
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I rubbed my eye and an eyelash came out and I cried “nooo!” and then blew it off my finger and whispered “be free”
I’m watching hummingbirds fly around on tv and they just sound like tiny little bee planes buzzing and humming when they flap their wings and they’re just zooming around looking ridiculous and oh my god I started laughing really hard
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nightlanding:
niggasinpariseleventimes:
niggasinparis∞times
I’m back home now cool I guess
No time to blog I have to be up in 4 hours to work an 8 hour shift hahahahahaha ph my god
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Watcha very niggas in paris christmas
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Mmmm I’m home I made it
I get to open presents in 8 hours woooo
I’m gonna take a 2 hour nap I’m cheating
